I'm All Meshed Up

Bladder Mesh Surgery Gone Wrong

Not a Mesh Post but a post on my daughter’s Wedding…I needed a change tonight…hope you enjoy…

on May 17, 2012

I think at some point in all of our lives we have defining moments. At some points those moments come rushing back to us sparked by some event we have just gone through.

 I have to admit that at the time of Ron’s death, I felt like that was the most defining moment of my life. I had survived the horrors of my husbands Cancer and fulfilled my promise to him to die with peace and dignity in his own home surrounded by his greatest loves, his family, friends, but most of all, his children. At that time we were a family broken by pain and death and I remember thinking how would we even begin to carry on from this tragic event.

Over the course of the next few years, my kids and I became inseparable at times…we forged new bonds and picked up the pieces of what was left of our broken family and put one foot in front of the other each day treading new unchartered territory. What we did not know at that time was how strong that bond would become and that it would never be torn apart again.

 Michael’s wedding last November was the start of new lives for us…he was now a married man and was making his own decisions about life and what lay ahead. On his wedding day I looked at him in total awe and amazement at how he had come through such pain from his Dad’s death and then his battle with Cancer and yet he was truly truly happy, he laughed, he cried, he loved  and on that day, my precious baby boy became a man. That was a very proud day for me.

During this time I had met James and my life was filled with such happiness, my kids were settling into their own lives and things were really really good. We had challenges to over come but we stood together and faced them head on. There were times though I felt like our family was being torn apart again by certain events, but once again we emerged renewed and stronger than ever. 

Now came the announcement of Letisha’s wedding so we once again pulled together and had fun planning and celebrating.  Teisha’s wedding for me was much harder as it signified the actual acknowledgement of the death of her Dad. It’s interesting to me how the weddings of both my kids were so different at times and yet so alike. I knew Teisha’s would be more painful in some ways as she did not have her father to walk her down the aisle or dance the first dance with…all the things a little girl dreams about.  So we came up with ways of making her special day just as happy and memorable as Mike’s wedding was.

One of her bridesmaids, Stephanie, came up with a wonderful way in which her Dad could “escort” her down the aisle, and that was to pin a picture of her Dad to her garter belt!!! My little girl had her Dad beside her just as she had dreamed of.  Teisha also gave me the great honour of “giving her away”…I shed a tear or two as the Commissionaire asked “who gives this woman too..” and I very proudly stated. “I do”…my heart was racing with joy and sadness at the same time. For her father/daughter dance, I once again had the great honour of dancing with her to a song her Dad sang to her every night at bedtime, “You are so beautiful to me”…It was a bittersweet moment.

But even with all of these wonderful events taking place, I think that my most proudest and most defining moment of my life came when my son escorted his sister down the aisle. It represented the love of two siblings becoming stronger together and sharing what must be one of the best moments of their lives as siblings. My heart was ready to burst at that moment. I have never had a feeling of such overwhelming love for my kids (aside from the day they were born of course!!!) until this point. I love my kids to death every day but that particular moment was beyond how I could ever find words to describe it. I looked at these two souls who have endured so much in their short lives and thought My God, they are the most wonderful and beautiful people in my life. They came through such adversity to this utmost defining heart warming moment. They put all of their differences aside and joined together in celebrating this moment in time as a brother and a sister who truly love and respect each other.  I have never been more proud of OUR children. At that moment, I knew in my heart that Ron and I had done a damn fine job of raising our children.

I now know that no matter what challenges we have ahead, Teisha and Michael will always have each other to turn too. There are so many people I want to thank but I think its best I just send out a HUGE THANK YOU  as you all know who you are!!! So many people contributed in many wonderful ways for each of my kids weddings and my heart is overflowing with the love that has been shown to my family.

As I sit here writing this, I must admit the tears are flowing because I realize how special so many of you are to me and my family and how grateful I am to have so many wonderful people in our lives. I hope that many of you have such memorable defining moments of pride and love in your lives as have I.

I truly believe that through our darkest most painful times, we emerge as much stronger, tolerant and compassionate people. May all the days of your lives be filled with much love and happiness as mine have. Hold your family and friends close to your heart always….

Love,

Diane


4 responses to “Not a Mesh Post but a post on my daughter’s Wedding…I needed a change tonight…hope you enjoy…

  1. steph069 says:

    Both were very special days! Teisha’s my best friend! I’m so happy I am apart of your family’s life, I love you all! ❤ xoxo

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  2. steph069 says:

    Those we’re both very special days, I’m proud to be apart of both of them! Teisha is my best friend! I’m so happy to be apart of your family’s life, I love you all! ❤ xoxo

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  3. Deborah says:

    Thank-you very much Diane, for all the information/links you’ve provided. It’s so very hard to find out about female pelvic problems. I have some POP & am scheduled to see a gynecologist very soon. Was so stressed trying to find out info & being unsuccessful – at least I now have the peace of mind that I am absolutely definite on one thing – NO MESH IN MY BODY! Thanks again from the bottom of my heart.

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    • You are very welcome Deborah!!! I started this blog initially to heal my broken soul and from there I found that educating and advocating is my passion…I love to write and am currently writing a book on my life experiences….I will have further resource lists to publish so stay tune!!!!
      Hugs,
      Diane

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