I'm All Meshed Up

Bladder Mesh Surgery Gone Wrong

Oh my, what a MESH of a day…

on July 12, 2012

I couldn’t decide whether this is a “MESH BLOG” or a “Turning Over a New Leaf after 50″ BLOG!!! It’s a little bit of both so I think the proper thing to do is post it under both! Hmmm…I could even start a NEW BLOG entitled, I’m a Mesh over 50”!!! Maybe not, 3 BLOGS and writing a book is about all I can handle right now!

One thing about me that any one of my family or friends knows is that I am fiercely independent and have a knack for biting off more than I can chew! I proved that theory right today!

I needed some groceries and although various people have offered to do it for me, I feel bad asking for one and secondly I am going to go crazy in this damn house soon, so off I go to the market…how bad can it be….

I didn’t park in “Handicapped” parking today after yesterdays fiasco but I did manage to snag a front row spot or I would have hit the old handicapped again! I waltzed into the store with my “little” shopping list, with James gone I tell myself I don’t need that many groceries…that theory was also shot to hell, $123,00 later I am up to my eyeballs in bags!

 There is an elderly couple behind me both with their walkers, it was actually quite cute until the wife says to her husband, ” why does SHE need help out to her car, she’s young” the husband mutters something about me being sick (good for him he was defending me) but his wife would have no part of that explanation and groaned rather loudly…I had told the cashier I couldn’t lift the bags so she said someone would help me out with them, done deal! Apparently the elderly couple had their hearing aids turned down for that part of the conversation or was it just selective hearing? Hmm…one does have to wonder…

I contemplated turning around and saying something to them but I just couldn’t put what little energy I had left into them so I left with my groceries being wheeled out by the gentleman helping me…I could get used to this service…

Next problem I didn’t quite think through properly was how the heck I was going to get this stuff in my house and up 13 stairs! Ok don’t panic Diane, my neighbor is home and she has offered help any time I need it…I knock on her door and ask if she minds helping me, not a problem she replies…ok now, picture this, BOTH my knees are bummed and ONE of hers is bummed! So you can imagine the hysterical laughs we were having as we were each taking one bag at a time one stair at a time! We looked at each and just shook our heads…It took us a good 15 minutes of shuffling bags one stair at a time but we got the job done! YAY! My neighbor did spot the chocolate bar in one of my bags though  and grabbed it pretty darn fast! She laughed and said, “Hey, if I’m gonna be in pain helping you with your groceries, the least you can do is give me your damn chocolate bar! Geesshhh, didn’t see that one coming! I was looking forward to it! Oh well, better for her to have another dimple on her ass than me… 🙂

Groceries are away and now I am on to solving the problem of my voicemail password that I haven’t used in probably 2 years! No one calls me, they text and that’s how I roll!!!! One piece of advice I can give is: NEVER LOOSE YOUR VOICEMAIL PASSWORD! I have spent the better part of the past hour being shuffled around to different departments only to find that the temporary password they gave me doesn’t work! I call back and report this and I am told that there will be a $5.00 fee for them to reset it! WTF!!! If the password YOU gave me doesn’t work, how is this MY fault! I just ripped someone a new asshole, (sorry for being this descriptive but this is one of James’ favorite sayings when he is mad and I feel I have earned the right to use it as I am that mad today! ) the poor guy but honestly I am tired of being walked all over! I learned I could go on-line and do it myself which is exactly what I did! Gawd I’m good some days…doesn’t happen often so I take it and run with it when it does….

So in between all of this happening, I get a phone call from the Hospital I had my surgery at. Prior to my surgery, a “specimen kit” was sent to the hospital so that once the mesh was removed it gets put into the kit and sent for pathology. So the hospital calls ME and says I didn’t sign a consent form for this to happen! I freak out on the lady as I don’t believe I am supposed to be involved in all of this technical mumble jumble stuff! I fire off and email to my Lawyer and thankfully he responds right away stating he will take care of it tomorrow…phfewwwww…another disaster diverted…I was having a mild heart attack!!!

Remember how yesterday I said there are days you just sit down,  shake your head and say WTF, well today was another one of them!

I think the rest of the evening is going to be spent laying flat-out on my couch exhausted from the days activities! Everyday I try to push my limitations and everyday my body lets me know it aint gonna happen, yet… 

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with one single step”

“I choose….. to live by choice, not by chance. To make changes, not excuses. To be motivated, not manipulated. To be useful, not used. To excel, not compete. I choose self-esteem, not self pity. I choose to listen to my inner voice, not the random opinions of others. I choose to be happy rather than sad. I choose to not have regrets but rather learn from my mistakes. I choose to be a lover not a fighter. I choose to live my life like there will be no tomorrow.”

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